POETRY

RESTING

They begin slowly at first, creeping and crawling,
Like the breath of a runner, they quicken with brawling.
Plunging into a void, the air evading my lungs;
Sucked up inside, each shiver licking like tongues.
I burst into the open, despairing for breath,
My arms flap around me, my legs feel like Death.
I put myself here, I yearned for this mess!
To escape life’s “gift”, its heartache, its stress…
The cold closes in, the light finally fading fast,
Choking burning ice, are these moments my last?
What should one think of? When one is about to fade?
Of sadness, of happiness, or of the life I haven’t made?
The darkness of the sky cracks for I am beyond saviour;
He is looking upon me, judging my behaviour.
Leisurely I sink, and I think of my kin;
I think of His scrutiny of this act, of this sin.
Vision escapes my eyes with panic on calm,
It’s a “deadly place”, yet so beautiful; no alarm.
The currents ease me down, my heart a graceful weight
Abyss finally finds me, my peace, my fate

SUICIDE ATTEMPT

It is a shadow lurking in your mind, darker than the dark;
It is a muffling of a smothering blanket when you finally feel a spark
It is a smile that can come and fall, as easily as a tear;
It is a heart sent racing for no reason at all, but all you can feel is fear
It is a growing ache of a bottomless pit, unlike any torture you've known;
It is a dread inside, a pain in your chest when picking up your phone 
It is a hollow numbness chewing at you until you're empty from within 
It is a desperate need, a final resort, to give in to ultimate Sin
But when it is not these things, just you left on a bed, next to your medical chart
It is a face of mother gazing upon her baby, with a shattering heart

DESTROY YOURSELF

Self destruction is a thing of such merit 
Whether it be because of circumstances, people or things we inherit 
Despair and dejection can hollow out a soul 
And in its place it can leave a gaping hole 
Brushing teeth, looking in mirrors and even opening post 
Is the downward spiral of losing what matters most 
Self respect and love get thrown into the void as you tear yourself to shreds 
And your life becomes unimportant, insubstantial, spent in hospital beds 
So down and down you eventually fall
Destroying yourself through hate, recreational drugs, alcohol
But when that one little tear, person or whatever it may be suddenly sheds some light
You stand on two feet and begin to fight 
To become who you are or who you’re meant to be
Destroying yourself first will set you free

A MOTHER

Softly the smell would arouse him, the fresh sent sizzling into the nose
Always, it woke him; the late, light mornings of rest,
For if he rests now is a mystery the other side knows
Tip-taps on the stairs, he would run, tumbling down,
Growing older, growing bigger, it was always me that he chose
Shivers on skin; the thin air floating in sleep of his pondering breech
You’re running, you’re laughing, your hair, the wind blows,
The lines of time once carving patiently with a beautiful screech;
But now, only disfigured, unfinished wood remains on your age old frame
You’re gone now, my mind swirls, as is my everlasting Mother joy,
But my Mother pride overwhelms me, like a beast I cannot tame
And the fire burns on, not a flicker to our flame.
The coffin of love I now bury, going down, up, playing like a boy, once again

MURDER

Smoothly he strolled deep into the dark, his face well hidden from sight
Noise, movement and panic fluttered around, with sirens and whispers and light
To the shadows he kept, slick hands in pockets, keeping her life source from view
More annoyances buzzed around, suspicious and searching; and it was him for all they knew
On and on he casually sauntered, a smile soon splitting his face
And on and on his puppets would dance in a wonderful, thrilling chase
He'd known when he'd seen her, that she was the one, her hair and her eyes so stark
The colour to her cheeks; the bob of her throat - he'd finally found his mark 
Wet and dripping from the mist of rain, the man then stepped into view
And there he spied a merry drunken joint, for the night to begin anew

SISTERS

They say blood runs thicker than water, and in my home this is exceptionally true
For me and my sister are two sides of the same coin through and through
My best friend, my soulmate, bound to each other from a whole other time
We go together like Yin and Yang, like chocolate and strawberries, like lemon and lime
In the music we love, gifts we give and enjoy together as one
In the wine we drink, the games we play, the way we muck about and have fun
She still holds my hand in big busy crowds even though I’m grown 
She still protects me, tells me off and treats me like her own
We differ in so many ways from her organised order to my messy disorder 
From the way she lets things go easily and I’m like a fire Drake, a hoarder 
But we both love laughing, being weird, wild and free 
And I will love my best friend forever, for it’s my sister and me

MY MOTHER

What is it that makes my mother so naturally inspiring?
The woman that gives and gives without ever tiring
Is it when the world yawned open and her child’s feet fell through
She showed her love and compassion and watched on as she grew
Perhaps it is the carving of time, security and affection 
Never once did she give a single rejection
Maybe it is the sentiment, the gifts, the hugs she will give
When her baby will cry and say she can’t live 
The support in hard times, a gentle breeze helping a leaf find its path
Stern words that are given, but still caring in her wrath
This woman so strong with endless ability to cope
Filling her children with food and warmth and hope
There when no one else is, being a mum and a dad
To have a woman like her makes her children glad 
There when her child said that she wanted to die
Each downfall and spiral, there through every lie
She can see through smiles, to the tears that hide beneath 
This woman who loves dearly, who taught her children to brush their teeth
She taught them to read, write, talk and dress 
How to clean dirty plates and not make a mess 
She taught them to stand on their own, how to be an adult
And never put them in the blame or put them at fault
This woman with infinite smiles and such mirth
The lady who gives everything and went through birth
How can a family so grateful, of two sisters and a brother
Ever find the words to describe their beautiful mother

CAN YOU GUESS WHAT IT IS?

It prowls for you, slowly it creeps 
It slinks and sneaks just before it reaps 
It jumps and attacks, taking you by surprise 
It captures and maims and whispers sweet lies 
It sometimes burns with passion so bright 
It singes and stings your eyes with clarifying light 
It warms and tingles from your head to your toes 
It steals your breath and heals your lows 
It flutters in your stomach, your heart skipping a beat 
It arises colour in your cheeks, every time you meet
It often can be toxic and poison looking to suffocate
It makes you want to flee before it’s too late 
It can become too much too quick and cause a scare 
It causes reactions, even just by the smell of hair
It blinds us with ignorance, making us unable to see
So what do you think it could possibly be?

SOMEONE OLD AND SOMEONE NEW

It was a moment of beauty, their eyes locking and holding
Their future laid out bare before them, shaping and moulding
Eyes held and small smiles growing 
At the cinema they met for the latest showing 
Arm wrapped around her she knew nothing but bliss 
And then they were entwined, becoming one with their first kiss 
So it went on and on, secret looks and stolen embraces 
Until one chill evening three words were uttered, warming their faces 
They carried on, making their love known
Each other’s moods, thoughts and senses they began to hone
Until she couldn’t bare it any longer and he was beginning to smother 
Suffocated by love, eyes gleaming she turned to her mother 
The words she’d dare utter were then spoken 
And something inside the two became utterly broken
Years down the line again they tried and tried 
Saying she was ready but she had lied
To repair what had been lost, to regain what was
Things didn’t work out and it was a loss 
But something sparked in her years later, giving renewed fire 
He was aloof, cold, confused and came across a liar 
Her mind, body and soul she threw at him to face 
He shrank back, unsure what to do, wanting to take it at a slow pace 
Agreeing to this if only to put him at ease 
She was there for him, a friend, willing to please 
But still he was off, unsure of how to feel 
Amongst it all her head began to reel 
So the story continues, her love forever growing 
The future mysterious and fickle, keeping them both never knowing